Nobody tells you how expensive kids are until you’re standing in the diaper aisle doing mental math at 11 p.m.
Or maybe they did tell you, and you nodded politely while thinking, “How bad can it be?” Turns out, pretty bad. The USDA estimates that raising a child to age 18 costs over $230,000 on average, and that number climbs every year.
But here’s what I’ve learned after four years of parenting on a real-world budget: the families who save the most aren’t the ones who deprive themselves. They’re the ones who build small, repeatable habits that compound over time. They meal plan. They automate. They say no to the stuff that doesn’t matter so they can say yes to what does.
These aren’t extreme couponing tactics or “never buy coffee again” lectures. These are practical shifts that have saved our family thousands, and they might do the same for yours.
1) Meal planning saves more than you think
I used to think meal planning was for people with more time than me. Then I started tracking how much we spent on last-minute takeout, forgotten groceries that went bad, and duplicate pantry items because I couldn’t remember what we had. It was embarrassing.
Now, every Sunday morning while Julien naps, I spend about 20 minutes planning the week’s dinners. I check what’s already in the fridge, build a grocery list around it, and stick to that list like it owes me money.
According to the Natural Resources Defense Council, the average American family throws away about $1,500 worth of food each year. That’s not a typo. Fifteen hundred dollars, straight into the trash.
Meal planning isn’t about being rigid. It’s about having a loose framework so you’re not standing in front of the open fridge at 5:30 p.m. wondering what to feed everyone. Even planning four or five dinners a week and leaving room for leftovers or pizza night makes a huge difference. Our grocery bill dropped by about $200 a month once we got consistent with this.
2) Automate your savings before you see the money
This one sounds obvious, but most families I talk to still don’t do it. If saving money requires you to actively move it each month, it probably won’t happen. Life gets busy. Kids get sick. You forget.
Set up an automatic transfer from your checking account to a savings account the day after payday. Even $50 a week adds up to $2,600 a year. You adjust to living on what’s left faster than you’d expect. Camille and I started doing this when Elise was born, and honestly, we don’t even notice the money leaving anymore. It just becomes part of the rhythm.
The key is making it invisible. As behavioral economist Shlomo Benartzi has noted, people are far more likely to save when the decision is made in advance and automated. We’re not fighting our own impulses every month.
The system does the work for us. If your employer offers direct deposit splitting, use it. Send a portion straight to savings before it ever hits your main account.
3) Buy secondhand first, new second
Kids grow fast. Elise has gone through four shoe sizes in the past year alone. If we bought everything new, we’d be broke and buried in barely-worn clothes.
Our default now is to check secondhand options first. Facebook Marketplace, local buy-nothing groups, consignment sales, thrift stores. You’d be amazed at the quality of stuff people give away or sell for next to nothing. Last month I picked up a practically new balance bike for $15. Retail? Over $100.
This applies to toys, books, gear, and furniture too. Kids don’t care if something is new. They care if it’s fun. And let’s be honest, most toys have a shelf life of about three weeks before they’re forgotten anyway.
Why pay full price for that? The ThredUp Resale Report found that the secondhand market is growing faster than traditional retail, and families are leading the charge. There’s no shame in it. It’s just smart.
4) Cancel the subscriptions you forgot you had
This is a quick win that feels almost too easy. Go through your bank statement right now and look at every recurring charge. Streaming services you don’t watch. Apps you downloaded once. That free trial you forgot to cancel. It adds up quietly.
We did this audit last year and found over $70 a month in subscriptions we weren’t really using. That’s $840 a year. For what? A meditation app I opened twice and a magazine subscription that went straight to recycling.
I’m not saying cancel everything. Keep what you actually use and love. But be honest with yourself. If you haven’t opened it in two months, it’s probably not adding value to your life. Set a calendar reminder to do this audit every six months. Subscriptions have a way of creeping back in.
5) Use the library like it’s a secret weapon
I don’t know when libraries became underrated, but they are. Ours has books, obviously, but also movies, audiobooks, museum passes, toys, puzzles, and free story time every week. Elise thinks it’s a magical place, and she’s not wrong.
Before buying any book, I check if the library has it first. Nine times out of ten, they do. If they don’t, I can usually request it through interlibrary loan. We’ve saved hundreds of dollars on books alone, and our shelves aren’t overflowing with stuff we’ll never read again.
Many libraries also offer free access to digital resources like Kanopy for streaming movies or Libby for e-books. It’s all included with your library card, which costs nothing. If you’re not using your local library, you’re leaving money on the table.
6) Embrace the “wait 48 hours” rule
Impulse buying is the budget killer nobody talks about. You see something online, it looks perfect, you click “add to cart,” and three days later a box shows up that you’ve already half-forgotten about.
Our rule now is simple: if it’s not essential, wait 48 hours before buying. Most of the time, the urge passes. You realize you didn’t actually need it. You were just bored or stressed or scrolling too late at night.
This works especially well for kid stuff. That toy Elise desperately wanted at Target? She forgot about it by the time we got to the car. Kids move on fast. Adults can learn to do the same. The 48-hour rule has probably saved us more than any other single habit on this list.
7) Cook in batches and embrace leftovers
Sunday batch cooking has become one of my favorite rituals. I throw on a podcast, chop vegetables, and make two or three big dishes that will carry us through the week. Soups, casseroles, grain bowls, slow cooker meals. Nothing fancy, just food that reheats well.
This saves money in two ways. First, you’re buying ingredients in bulk and using them efficiently. Second, you’re not tempted to order delivery on those chaotic weeknights when cooking feels impossible. Having something ready to heat up is a game changer.
Leftovers aren’t sad. They’re strategic. I’ve started thinking of them as “future meals I already made.” Reframe it that way and suddenly eating the same soup twice doesn’t feel like a sacrifice. It feels like a win.
8) Talk about money with your partner regularly
This isn’t a budgeting hack exactly, but it might be the most important habit on this list. Camille and I have a quick money check-in every Sunday. We look at what we spent, what’s coming up, and whether we’re on track for the month. It takes maybe ten minutes.
These conversations used to feel awkward. Money is loaded. But now they’re just part of our routine, like syncing calendars or dividing up the week’s pickups and drop-offs. When you’re both on the same page, you make better decisions together. You catch problems early. You celebrate wins.
As financial therapist Amanda Clayman has observed, couples who talk about money regularly report less financial stress and more relationship satisfaction. It makes sense. Silence breeds assumptions, and assumptions breed conflict. Talking keeps you aligned.
9) Say no to birthday party excess
Kids’ birthday parties have gotten out of control. I’ve seen bounce houses, petting zoos, and custom cakes that cost more than my first car payment. And the kids? They just want to run around with their friends and eat sugar.
We’ve kept Elise’s parties simple. A few friends, some backyard games, homemade cupcakes, and a piñata from the dollar store. Total cost: maybe $75. She talks about those parties for months. The joy isn’t in the expense. It’s in the togetherness.
You don’t have to keep up with anyone else’s party. Your kid won’t remember whether the decorations matched. They’ll remember who was there and how they felt. Spend your money on presence, not production value.
10) Track your spending for just one month
If you’ve never tracked where your money actually goes, try it for 30 days. Use an app, a spreadsheet, or a notebook. Write down every single purchase. Coffee, diapers, gas, subscriptions, everything.
Most people are shocked by what they find. Small purchases add up in ways you don’t notice until you see them all together. That $5 here and $10 there? It’s often hundreds of dollars a month.
You don’t have to track forever. But doing it once gives you a baseline. You see your patterns. You spot the leaks. And then you can make informed decisions about what to cut and what to keep. Knowledge is power, especially when it comes to money.
Closing thoughts
Saving money as a family isn’t about deprivation. It’s about intention. It’s about deciding what matters to you and building habits that support those priorities. For us, that means experiences over stuff, time together over convenience, and systems that run quietly in the background so we’re not constantly stressed about finances.
None of these habits require a complete lifestyle overhaul. Start with one or two. See how they feel. Adjust as you go. The goal isn’t perfection. The goal is progress, small and steady, week after week.
Your family’s version of this will look different from ours, and that’s exactly how it should be. What matters is that you’re thinking about it, talking about it, and making choices that serve your future selves. That’s the real win.
